Ellie Goulding reveals that she has struggled with ‘paralyzing anxiety’ and after welcoming her son Arthur

Ellie Goulding has revealed that she is struggling to deal with her crippling anxiety, eight months after receiving her son Arthur Ever Winter.

The singer, 35, wished her fans a happy new year and admitted that although this year has been the ‘very best’ in her life when she became a mother, she has also ‘worn’.

In an emotional post, Ellie said she has been dealing with a ‘kind of panic I did not even know existed’.

Struggles: Ellie Goulding has revealed that she has had a difficult year tackling her anxiety, and says she has dealt with a

Struggles: Ellie Goulding has revealed that she has had a difficult year tackling her anxiety, saying she has dealt with a “kind of panic I did not even know existed”

On Instagram, Ellie reflected on her accomplishments from the past year, which included welcoming her son, now eight months old, with her husband Caspar Jopling and publishing her first book, Fitter. Quieter. Stronger.

Ellie, who returned to work three weeks after giving birth, wrote: ‘Happy New Year everyone … The last year has been the very best of my life. I became a mother, the greatest joy I know.

‘I’ve had time to sit down with amazing musicians and writers and made exciting new music that I hope will give people who hear it the same euphoric escape that I experienced when I wrote it.

‘I have published my first book, listed for the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge, the President and Joni Mitchell (and I can not explain how grateful I am for that privilege).

Mother: The singer, 35, wished her fans a happy new year and said that although this year has been the 'very best' in her life when she became the mother of her son Arthur, she has also 'fought'

Mother: The singer, 35, wished her fans a happy new year and said that although this year has been the ‘very best’ in her life when she became the mother of her son Arthur, she has also ‘fought’

‘I have a dog and a cat who love me, I have my friends who really love me and I have a man who loves and supports me every single day.

‘But this year has also been the hardest in my life. I have struggled daily, every night, every hour with a kind of panic I did not even know existed.

“While moments of standing on stage in front of you all have been some of the most uplifting and soothing, I have struggled this year.”

Ellie went on to explain that her anxiety has dictated many parts of her life and career, but added that it has also made her who she is today.

Hitmaker Love Me Like You Do said she decided to write the honest post as many of her fans had asked her how she was feeling recently.

Reflective: On Instagram, she talked about all her accomplishments from the past year, which included welcoming her son, now eight months, with her husband Caspar Jopling

Reflective: On Instagram, she talked about all her accomplishments from the past year, which included welcoming her son, now eight months, with her husband Caspar Jopling

She continued: ‘If I really had to think about it, my anxiety has dictated quite a bit of my life and career and I’m sorry.

‘But it has also made me who I am, and sometimes when I am most scared, when I feel there is no escape from the pure panic and fear in my heart and brain, I remind myself that I can feel it.

‘I feel so much and that’s how I’ve come to this place in my life. I want to tell you this on the last day of this year because so many of you have asked how I feel and often do not get an answer.

‘It’s because I’ve been too scared to admit that the answer is not very good. I feel like something is broken inside – something that has been deeply echoed by the few I have opened up to.

‘This is something so many people have been through, you might be going through right now, or might want to go through in the future – and I just wanted to say, and I have to constantly remind myself that it’s not just you, it’s not just me. Crippled by anxiety.

'I feel there is no escape': Ellie ended her post by urging others who may feel the same way to talk to those around them, saying she believes 2022 will be a 'bright' year

‘I feel there is no escape’: Ellie ended her post by encouraging others who may feel the same way to talk to those around them, saying she believes 2022 will be a ‘bright’ year

‘I know so many of you reading this are feeling the same pain, and at the same time so many of you will not have experienced it, but will most likely know someone who has struggled.’

Ellie ended her post by encouraging others who may feel the same way to talk to those around them, saying she believes 2022 will be a ‘bright’ and ‘positive’ year.

She added: ‘For those who are in this right now, we are together and we can get through this – most importantly, by talking.

‘Talking and opening up is the hardest and best thing you can do. Life is a valuable thing and seeing Arthur grow every day gives me so much hope.

Family: Ellie married her art dealer husband Caspar in August 2019, and the couple welcomed their son Arthur earlier this year

Family: Ellie married her art dealer husband Caspar in August 2019, and the couple welcomed their son Arthur earlier this year

‘I have so much love and energy for everyone who goes through this. Let’s get through this together.

‘2022 will be a bright year. Positive energy. Together. Unsubscribe (too little) and send as much love, as always, to you all xx ‘(sic)

Ellie married her art dealer husband Caspar in August 2019, and the couple welcomed their son Arthur earlier this year.

The couple has chosen to keep their son’s face shielded from the limelight.

Last month, Ellie reflected on how she embraced her post-partum figure after giving birth to Arthur in April.

New Mom: Last month, Ellie (pictured during pregnancy) reflected on how she embraced her post-partum figure after giving birth to Arthur in April

New Mom: Last month, Ellie (pictured during pregnancy) reflected on how she embraced her post-partum figure after giving birth to Arthur in April

She talked about how ‘she just didn’t care’ that her ‘stomach hung out’ after welcoming her little boy while talking about her self-acceptance journey and how she overcame her exercise addiction.

In a speech on the Reign With Josh Smith podcast, Ellie talked about the challenges of returning to work three weeks after giving birth, how touring in the past led to her squirting, and how she was a ‘bad place’ when she felt need for constant training.

After reflecting on how motherhood affected her body image, Ellie said: ‘I just had a flashback to maybe two or three weeks after I gave birth.

Touring: Tale on the Reign With Josh Smith podcast, Ellie talked about the challenges of returning to work three weeks after giving birth

Touring: Tale on the Reign With Josh Smith podcast, Ellie talked about the challenges of returning to work three weeks after giving birth

‘I was walking around in this comfortable T-shirt and some leggings, I was doing yoga or some postnatal thing and my stomach was like hanging out and I just didn’t care. I have never worried less about my body being exposed.

And Caspar comes in, I think we had a builder at the time, and I did not care. I just did not think, “I have to cover up.” Nor did it seem that anyone cared.

“You just had a baby, and also this comfort of knowing that I’m not my normal self and not feeling an urge to lose weight, not feeling an urge to look, in inverted commas,” how I used to to look “.

‘It’s like you’re appreciating your body just a little bit more because you realize it’s done something pretty fat.’

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