Signs that your mother-in-law actually hates you

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As if sharing your life with a loving, supportive significant other was not bad enough. Here are the most obvious signs that your mother-in-law actually hates you.

She challenges you to D’Rhakur, the maternal kamprite

She challenges you to D’Rhakur, the maternal kamprite

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Two warriors will enter the sacred arena, but only one will leave with your partner’s heart.

Your brakes are mysteriously cut when you leave her house

Your brakes are mysteriously cut when you leave her house

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Once could have been anyone, but now the pattern has become quite clear.

She wants grandchildren

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This is an obvious trick to make you unhappy forever.

She seems to love your spouse more

She seems to love your spouse more

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As you may try, you can not get her to treat you with the same affection that she gives to the child she has raised from birth.

She smiles and is sweet to you every time she sees you

She smiles and is sweet to you every time she sees you

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No doubt that woman is saying terrible things about you behind your back.

She has purchased a tombstone for you engraved with a date of death in the near future

She has purchased a tombstone for you engraved with a date of death in the near future

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Those things are not cheap and she will probably be motivated to get something for her money.

She denies you Anti-Venom

She denies you Anti-Venom

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The last thing you ever hear after that cotton bite is your mother-in-law telling your spouse that there are lots of fish in the ocean.

She only refers to you as “Granddaughter”

She only refers to you as “Granddaughter”

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You do not have to read between the lines on this one.

She’s trying to trick you into infidelity

She’s trying to trick you into infidelity

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Knowing that it would end your marriage, she constantly traps you in a room alone with alcohol, a blanket of bearskin and an absolute stud.

She has trained her guard dogs to attack you on sight

She has trained her guard dogs to attack you on sight

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Calling her vicious canines to go in to kill is a subtle hint she may have a problem with you.

She scratches your face out of family photos

She scratches your face out of family photos

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She does not even do this with pictures of her ex-husband.

She makes you sleep alone in a shed when you visit

She makes you sleep alone in a shed when you visit

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Of course, if it used to be a tent, she can warm up for you.

She teaches your 2-year-old the fastest way to become legally liberated

She teaches your 2-year-old the fastest way to become legally liberated

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You may be angry, but it’s still impressive that your child’s first word was “liberation.”

She gives you an imperceptibly smaller piece of dessert

She gives you an imperceptibly smaller piece of dessert

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She knows what she’s doing.

She stopped having sex with you

She stopped having sex with you

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It is natural that the in-laws’ honeymoon decreases, but if you are not even lucky on your birthday, there is definitely an underlying anger there.

She turns away from YouTube videos you want to show her

She turns away from YouTube videos you want to show her

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Even early classics like David at the Dentist!

Her latest Christmas present for you was a Hitman

Her latest Christmas present for you was a Hitman

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It would have been thoughtful if you were not the target.

She does not apologize after driving you over with her car

She does not apologize after driving you over with her car

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If she apologized, you could chalk it up to a mistake, but not if she runs you over and then backs over you again without saying sorry.

She just does not want to die

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If she continues to fight for life, it’s only to make your life a hell.

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